Where the Sun Really Don’t Shine: In Which Baji and Gojira Are Baji and Gojira (Days 2 and 3)

Day 2: Breakfast and Books Bonanza. As promised, Nani makes Gojira a mountain of buttery pancakes and true to her name, Gojira eats the mountain (her own) as well as the little hill abutting it (the beasts’). Then throughout the day, when no one is looking (and also when they are), she sneaks more pancakes from the fridge. ZP asks Gojira what her sister’s name is and when Gojira tells him that her sister is a brother and his name is Graxenheimer Schnitzel the Third, ZP says, “That’s a silly sister.” Indeed, ZP, indeed. AP tries to hobble Gojira to prevent her early departure by smashing Gojira’s foot with a basket of eggs. Concerned, AP takes the eggs to the local cardiologist, who is playing minigolf in the next room. He declares them bad for her cholesterol but good for the adorableness pageant.

With the threat of thunderstorms turning out to be empty, we return to the Jacaranda Public Library a few minutes after it opens and attack the book sale, where you can fill up a plastic bag with books for just $2! We each fill up a bag and have a grand old time, taking pictures of the sign for “Adult Videos” (consisting of videos about World War II) and of us with Wagamama Lackawanna Jacaranda eyes (you had to be there, and by “there” we mean “Ireland” and by “you” we mean “we”). TP reports that he is enjoying the country club’s tennis courts and so we go to Fatty Starbuckles and drink some caffeinated beverages while reading our books, one of which is the all-time classic  Good Fishing in Florida with a supremely useful author‘s note:

Rube Allyn’s Advice

Visit consignment store in attempt to find a sweater for AP in light of the inhospitable cold spell we are subjected to.  Return home, where Gojira is forced to speed-read  A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian because Baji will take it later. Gojira multitasks by devouring the book and a bowl of keema, which she washes down with mango lassi. In the evening, TP exercises while Baji and Gojira lounge around on the couch until bedtime during which we lounge around watching Lost. Baji patiently endures Gojira’s questions: Who is Jacob? Which past-future is this? What is that on Claire’s head? Did you know that those “Iraqi” goons just said, “Dost thou want to come with me?” Sawyer loved who?!

Day 3: Sushi! Also pancakes. Baji, TP and Gojira go to the outlet mall and look for a can opener. TP finds a shirt, a belt, and some kickin’ kicks; Baji finds a jacket and a styling yellow ensemble for AP; Gojira finds some underwear. Using the food court’s free wi-fi, we hem and haw over a place for lunch and finally decide upon Bonefish Grill, where we are cruelly denied entrance seeing as how they don’t open until 4 pm. Driving aimlessly and hankering for fish, we spot a sign for a sushi place at a local strip mall near the airport. Screeeech! But first we have to convince TP that mall sushi is clearly going to be safe and good and amazing.  In fact it is, and later he pretends it was his idea. We applaud Kumo Japanese Steak House and Sushi Lounge and mark it for future visits.

Tempura Tower awaiting destruction by Gojira

Later we buy more chips and eat them in the car as an appetizer for our meaty meat meat dinner (spinach and gosht and leftovers). Inhale Häagen-Dazs chocolate ice cream while thoroughly enjoying Julie & Julia (particularly when we draw similarities to our own cooking—”poaching an egg is not that hard!”; “living with her must be exhausting”; “I hate cutting onions like that”—and blogging). Agree that we like Julia better than Julie.

And then what happened? Did Bajira! commit aggravated philanthropy on a group of defenseful senior citizens? Did we plaster Lil Baji’s room with posters of Robert Pattinson? Did one of us contract a rare tropical disease? Some of the answers and more tomorrow!


8 responses to “Where the Sun Really Don’t Shine: In Which Baji and Gojira Are Baji and Gojira (Days 2 and 3)

  1. W. A. T. B. A. E. E. I. T. W.

  2. i like:

    “ZP asks Gojira what her sister’s name is ”
    “Fatty Starbuckles”
    “AP tries to hobble Gojira to prevent her early departure by smashing Gojira’s foot”
    “TP exercises while Baji and Gojira lounge”
    “later he pretends it was his idea”

  3. you should see the purple bruise i’ve got going on beneath my toenail from the lovely miss ap. it’s been more than a week and it’s still growing. it hurt like a motherfather.

  4. gj

    almost even split! i like that.

  5. that’ll teach you! imagine the marks zp bears on a daily basis.

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